She seems nice

Fiorina, above, tells a group of kindergartners to “piss off” with their “Santa Claus bullshit,” probably

Carly Fiorina, the Guinness record holder among US presidential candidates for quickest trip from “you know, she might have a chance at winning this thing” to “who?” in the television era, whose campaign now subsists largely on Ted Cruz’s charity, has taken up a new vocation: accosting preschoolers.

Carly Fiorina has been accused of “ambushing” a group of children, after she ushered pre-schoolers, who were on a field trip to a botanical garden, into an anti-abortion rally in Des Moines.

On Wednesday, the former Hewlett-Packard chief executive embarked on a day of campaigning across Iowa, in an attempt to boost her ailing presidential campaign.

The alleged ambush occurred when Fiorina hosted a “right to life” forum at the Greater Des Moines botanical garden. Entering the rally, before a crowd of about 60 people, she directed around 15 young children towards a makeshift stage.

The problem, one parent said, was that the children’s parents had not given Fiorina permission to have their children sit with her – in front of a huge banner bearing the image of an unborn foetus – while she talked about harvesting organs from aborted babies.

“The kids went there to see the plants,” said Chris Beck, the father of four-year-old Chatham, one of the children Fiorina appeared with. “She ambushed my son’s field trip.”

FFS, the MPAA has given the 2016 Republican primary a hard (haha) NC-17 rating precisely to keep this kind of thing from happening. When asked, Fiorina’s campaign said they were tickled that those 5 year olds had all voluntarily chosen to attend her campaign rally. No, seriously:

In answer to a detailed series of questions from the Guardian, a Fiorina spokeswoman said in an emailed statement: “We were happy that these children chose to come to Carly’s event with their adult supervisor.”

attwiw is still trying to verify reports that Fiorina later forced those same children to listen to her 45 minute stump speech on the dangers of radical Islam and how what happened to HP was not her fault, thank you very much. We can confirm that a snap poll taken just before afternoon nap found that 11% of the children were now “considering caucusing” for Fiorina, while 13% “want[ed] to go home,” 22% were “a little bit scared,” and 48% were hoping that “the mad lady will give [us] a cookie.” More on this story as it develops.

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